I have some good news, some bad news and since I’m am optimist, it will be followed by some more good news, for you. The good news is that the confusion about your bisexuality is that you’re experiencing is NORMAL. Nearly every single bisexual has experienced confusion in the midst of this journey. The bad news is that the uncertainty may be around for a while and, even though you may have dealt with certain issues or aspects of your journey, confusion about being bicurious or bisexual may well resurface at a later stage. Unfortunately, it’s part of the process so there isn’t any possible way of avoiding it. The last bit of good news that I have for you is that despite the confusion, you’re able to deal with things in your own way and at your own time.
Coming to terms with being Bisexual.
The confusion about your own Bisexuality that you’ve been experiencing is a very necessary and important part of the process. It challenges and motivates you to dig down deep and unveil hidden truths about yourself and your bisexuality. The kind of mindset that you have when dealing with your confusion will determine whether you’ll be overwhelmed by it or if you’ll have a good handle on things regardless of it’s presence in your life. If you opt to approach things with a mindset of having to get to the “finish line”, then you stand to feel overwhelmed by the confusion because of the amount of pressure that you’ll be putting yourself under. However, if you have a mindset where you’re willing to accept it’s presence in your life and focus on the role that your confusion plays in this process, then you be better equipped to handle things in the here and now, by taking things one step at a time.
The best possible way for you to deal with your confusion will be to spend time sorting through all of the questions and issues that you are confronted with and to put them in different compartments. If, for example, you’re married, some of the compartments that you may want to use would be:
Bisexuality – What do I understand about it? How am I experiencing it? etc
Marriage – How does this stand to impact my marriage? How will my wife respond to my bisexuality? etc
and so forth
You’re going to feel compelled to try to control things, but you need to make yourself aware that scary as things may appear to be, there really isn’t any need for you to be a control freak. In fact, the best way of dealing with things, once you’ve put your questions and issues into different compartments, would be to select one compartment and focus on dealing with things one issue at a time. Once you’ve finished cleaning out one compartment, only then will it be necessary to move on to the next one.
“What about the rest of my issues? Won’t they be a train wreck to my life?” May be your reaction.
Well, this approach reduces the risk of being faced with a train wreck because things will be contained and thus won’t blow up in your face…provided that you don’t mess with them. If, however, you try to juggle various issues, you stand to drop the ball in some way and thus set yourself up for a fall.
“It’s about the journey, and not the destination”.
Allow us to help you to bring your ship into the harbour, while enjoying the beauty of the sea. Coming to terms with bisexuality takes time and understanding what being bisexual means is always a learning process.